For a long time we lived life by the seat of our pants. We prided ourselves on being able to make presentations at work without preparation. By sheer force of will, not only did we make that presentation, but did so successfully. Spontaneity was our creed. Lucky for us that we were able to work this way. Given our drinking and drugging we were in no condition to put a lot of energy into pre planning. This sense of living moment by moment permeated our lives. Whether it was assembling a piece of furniture without looking at the directions or not asking for advice from friends we exulted in our self reliance. At some point however this philosophy stopped working for us. We stumbled at work, in relationships and in all aspects of our lives. Our drug of choice undercut that illusion of self reliance.
When we entered the program our heads began to clear. At first we thought we could return to our old ways. We began to see however that sobriety was not a seat of our pants approach. In fact, it was a highly structured way of life based on the experience strength and hope of others. Rather than winging it, the program demanded that we seek direction from others in the fellowship. This was done by working with a sponsor and listening to the shares of others at meetings. We also learned humility along the way by asking questions of others.
Personal Reflection: Do I ask for directions when necessary?